Me: Greg! Look! There’s a baby face on my phone cover.
Greg: Why are you dressed like a hooker?
Me: But there’s a baby face!
Greg: I see the baby face in the smudges on your phone, but that still doesn’t explain why you’re dressed like a hooker.
Me: Most guys would appreciate their wife dressing up like a hooker.
Greg: You’re hair is too messy. Hookers fix their hair.
Me: No they don’t! They are drug addicts and don’t care.
Greg: Then they couldn’t afford those shoes.
Me: Ok then stripper maybe.
Greg: They also have nice hair and they at least shave their legs.
Me: Ok, you got me there.
The hooker outfit wasn’t entirely on purpose. I had lost my pants earlier in the day. Yes, lost them. Then I got heart burn and was uncomfortable so I lost all on top but a tank top. But then I wanted to go outside so I found a black spandex skirt and thought it would be comfy. I put my hair up and it was at this point I realized that I did indeed kinda looked like a hooker, so I added the shoes. I really like those shoes.
*I relayed this conversation to my mom and my mom wants me to tell you all that I swear that I’m not leaving the house dressed like this. Thanks for protecting my modesty Mom.