So here’s a conversation between Greg and I today. This is by no means abnormal. In fact, it’s pretty typical.


Me: Greg! Look! There’s a baby face on my phone cover.

Greg: Why are you dressed like a hooker?

Me: But there’s a baby face!

Greg: I see the baby face in the smudges on your phone, but that still doesn’t explain why you’re dressed like a hooker.

Me: Most guys would appreciate their wife dressing up like a hooker.

Greg: You’re hair is too messy. Hookers fix their hair.

Me: No they don’t! They are drug addicts and don’t care.

Greg: Then they couldn’t afford those shoes.

Me: Ok then stripper maybe.

Greg: They also have nice hair and they at least shave their legs.

Me: Ok, you got me there.

The hooker outfit wasn’t entirely on purpose. I had lost my pants earlier in the day. Yes, lost them. Then I got heart burn and was uncomfortable so I lost all on top but a tank top. But then I wanted to go outside so I found a black spandex skirt and thought it would be comfy. I put my hair up and it was at this point I realized that I did indeed kinda looked like a hooker, so I added the shoes. I really like those shoes.

*I relayed this conversation to my mom and my mom wants me to tell you all that I swear that I’m not leaving the house dressed like this. Thanks for protecting my modesty Mom.

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